by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
Whenever I had the opportunity — like when I pulled on the wishbone of a turkey and made a wish or blew out the candles on my birthday cake and made a wish — I would use the opportunity to plan for some future success. That is, I would make my wishes specific and even place a time frame on them — that is, when I would like the wish to be granted. I don’t believe in making wishes nor do I ever expect that the wishes I make will come true. Then why, you might ask, do I waste my time making them?
I use strategies designed to motivate me and structure my life. Whenever I make a wish, I tie the wish into what I am currently working on or what I intend to do next. My wishes never challenged reality, set unreasonable goals, nor lay outside my skill level and abilities. It’s a little like providing my to-do-list with a catalyst — an agent designed to speed up my accomplishments. I have found it to be a fun technique for challenging myself to not just reach my goals but to achieve at a higher level (achievement and then some!), and become a better person.
(I have always believed that if indeed there was a fairy-god-mother who granted wishes, I might just as well be on her good side and make wishes she could grant if she could and would grant if she would. I know it’s pure silliness, but life can’t be all serious without a little fun. I find little bits of fun when and where I can! — just little bits!)
It is true that how I handle wishes — a very minor activity and occurrence, to be sure — is just one aspect of being proactive. Hunter Taylor, in an essay, “How to Become Proactive,” at eHow.com writes that "’Proactive’ is defined by Dictionary.com as ‘serving to prepare for, intervene in or control an expected occurrence or situation, esp. a negative or difficult one; anticipatory.’”
For me, the key to becoming more proactive comes down to one thing: Plan ahead. I know that’s easier said than done, but once the attitude shift is made (“I need to plan ahead”), the action will follow.
The best way to plan ahead is to be prepared. Build all the resources you can in all the ways you can at all the times and places you can. The more tools (resources) in your tool box, the more likely you can respond appropriately in any situation you find yourself. Knowing that you can respond makes it easier to plan ahead because you know exactly what resources you will need and how you will use them.
At eZineArticles.com, in her essay, “Tips to Become Proactive to Make Better Decisions in Life,” Michelle L Gallagher offers the best, compact, set of suggestions I have discovered: “Tip #1 - Remain Proactive in Tackling Challenges. . . .Tip #2 - Be a Problem-Solver, Not a Problem-Avoider. . . . Tip #3 - Manage Your Time and Resources Efficiently. . . . Tip #4 - Break Your Larger Goals Down into Daily Objectives. . . . Tip #5 - Spend Time Reflecting on Your Personal Life.” How you have responded in the past is a good indicator for how you will respond in the future; thus, reflecting gives you time to think about how you would like to respond and how you need to change to accomplish it.
One of the biggest challenges in my life happened after six years of teaching at the University of Massachusetts. In moving from there to Bowling Green State University, I was put in charge of a large, basic, speech-communication course. I lectured to 300 to 350 students (the same lecture 5 times a week) for fifteen weeks. To assist in and support my presentations (and to help students take notes), I used trays that contained 50 slides each. This was before Power Point Presentations that could be run from a laptop computer situated on a speaker’s lectern.
For every single presentation, without fail, I would go to the “control room” behind the lecture hall — behind the rear-projection screen where the slides were to be displayed. This was a “security” check for me to make certain the correct tray of slides was set up, that the projection equipment was working, that someone would be “on call” if there was a problem, and to let them (the control-room personnel) know that I was depending on them for all the technical apparatus, lighting, lavalier microphone (sound system), and quiet (I wanted to hear no noise of any kind from the control room while I was lecturing).
I made this trip — this check-up — five times a week, fifteen weeks a term, for twenty-two years. Did I ever encounter any problems? Of course. Most of them were minor and could be solved or addressed during my pre-lecture visits.
This is what proactive is all about. No matter how professional I was; no matter how many years I lectured; no matter how many times a week I performed, I routinely checked to assure quality control from those on whom I depended. I knew it, and my control-room personnel knew it, and I seldom encountered any problems — none that were major.
In my life I have discovered there is a close relationship between being positive and being proactive. That is, possessing a positive, optimistic, frame of mind, contributes significantly to my ability, need, and willingness to be proactive. At SelfGrowth.com, Albert Garoli, in an essay, “Become Positive, Become Proactive,” offers readers four strategies for developing a positive outlook: 1) Change the way you think so you can change the way you feel. . . . 2) In the moments when you can’t help being angry or irritated, take a deep breath. . . . 3) Get back to the basics and stop worrying about all those extras (like the fancy car, the brand-name clothes, your social status, etc.). . . . 4) Our daily issues and concerns seem miniscule when there is a bigger picture in the way. Think about a great project to do, a mission, something bigger than yourself or your family. Think about something that can impact a greater number of people for an extended period of time.” The thought is that if you become more positive, chances are you’ll become more proactive.
Being proactive has not only assisted me in my professional life, but it has helped as well in decision making, problem solving, and dealing with most daily issues and routines. To plan ahead has wonderful results in relieving stress, saving time, and getting more accomplished. Being proactive is an essential skill for anyone who is effective or who wants to be successful.
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At StevePavlina.com, Pavlina writes a great essay, “Be Proactive,” in which he contrasts proactivity and reactivity. There are many good ideas in this piece.
At About.com — Small Business: Canada, Susan Ward, in her essay,“5 Keys to Leadership for Small Business: Even Parties of One Need a Leader,” writes about the importance of proactivity for leaders. Her five keys are: 1) A leader plans, 2) A leader has a vision. 3) A leader shares her vision,4) A leader takes charge. 5) A leader leads by example.
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Copyright June, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Thursday, June 28, 2012
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Transitions
by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
It’s been happening a lot lately. Life transitions are being thrust before me, and I’ve heard that it gets worse as you get older. There have been a number of deaths, some people have entered “care facilities,” and there has been a wedding (one of my two sons, and the last of my four children, got married).
More than five years ago now, I read Gail Sheehy’s Passages (Ballantine Books, 2006), and I have been dramatically affected by it ever since. I never wrote a review of it (I wasn’t writing book reviews at the time), but the first review I found by Bertz “Happier” from Hawaii, at Amazon.com captured my thoughts exactly. This is just the very first part of the review: “Reading Passages by Gail Sheehy was a turning point in my life. I especially remember, ‘The most important words in midlife are — Let Go. Let it happen to you. Let it happen to your partner. Let the feelings. Let the changes.’ ‘You can't take everything with you when you leave on the midlife journey.’ ‘You are moving out of roles and into the self.’”
It’s not that I have been bereft of significant transitions in my own life nor that I did not know how to deal with them. It’s is simply — like many aspects of life — when they happen to you, you think you are the Lone Ranger. That is, you think you are the only one experiencing them and life crises only happen to you. Be quiet and move on with your life! Sheehy’s book is an eye opener only because she serves as a guide, mentor, and significant confidant.
One major transition for me was from being single to being married. When I left for Indiana University to study for my Ph.D., my future wife and I talked about the transition. We decided that for the move we would either be married, or we would split up. There was going to be no long-distance relationship. This was an important transition and contributed significantly to my successful work on my Ph.D. I had no choice except to want to do well, not just for myself, but now for a wife and a future family. Time to get serious. It was as if “life” was shouting: “Grow up now!”
When I moved from Indiana University to the University of Massachusetts, from graduate teaching assistant to instructor then professor, it was a major transition. From being a student to operating as a full-time college teacher can rattle your sensibilities. For twenty years I had only known how to “be a student,” and suddenly, within a four-month time span, I was on the other side solely responsible for my own students. Sure, being a graduate teaching assistant helped ease the transition, introduced me to college teaching, and set a valuable course of action; however, anyone can train, guide, and instruct, but they can’t get into your head and make the transition for you.
There was never a time during my professional life that I wasn’t writing. I published at least five scholarly articles from my dissertation alone — a rather remarkable outcome, I was told. Those successes led to many others (about 96 published articles), but none of my professional writing came close to the transition from unpublished book author to published book author.
I haven’t ever thought about why this was such a worthy transition for me until now. I think there are a number of reasons for it. First, I used between 50 and 100 textbooks (maybe more!) from the beginning of my formal (in class) educational career to when I completed my Ph.D. This fact, alone, put textbook writers on an especially high pedestal. That is because I always took my education seriously, read the books assigned, and performed well above average.
The second reason the transition from article writer to textbook author was significant was the praise I heard for textbook authors. The books we used were often subjects of conversation, the theories espoused were regularly bases for argument, and once I achieved the status of “professor,” books and authors were often compared and discussed. I enjoyed the thought of being the subject of such discussions.
When I interviewed for a position at Bowling Green State University (BGSU) (Spring, 1973), my first textbook (Speech/Communication (Van Nostrand, 1974), co-authored with Saundra Hybels) was just published, and I made it clear in the interview that I wanted to adopt the book for the basic speech course I was being asked to direct. There wasn’t a sign of dissension among those interviewing me — and I specifically looked for it. Actually, in retrospect, having a newly published textbook that satisfied exactly, the format of the course I was being asked to direct, increased my credibility among those faculty members. Not one of them had ever published a textbook.
Because the course I directed was large, and this was my first of a number of textbooks I authored, you would have a difficult time imagining what a thrill it was to see students on campus carrying around my textbook. I was a published, college-textbook author! Quite a transition.
As an aside here, it is that same textbook, with a different title, that is going into its 10th edition (Communicating Effectively, McGraw-Hill, 2012) — a continuous publishing record (counting Speech/Communication, 1974, as the starting point), with this one book, alone, of 38 years!
There have been other transitions, too. Like from having no children to being a parent. Then, the transition from being a parent of children to being a parent of teenagers! And the transition I like least of all is from “adult” to “wise old man” — especially when the emphasis is on “old.”
What I have enjoyed, too (for the most part), is watching our grown children and their children go through life’s transitions. This time, however, you watch with a different perspective since you have done it yourself, and since you are older and wiser now. At least, older!
Life goes on. Likewise, transitions go on, too. What has been especially fun for me is that I have had the opportunity not just to observe all of this, but I have had the thrill of documenting and writing about it. Probably the most important idea in the life transitioning that takes place is being flexible and adaptable, because often transitions cause change — if not physically, at least attitudinally. They cannot be avoided; attitude shifts take place, and life goes on. I think Gail Sheehy had it right. Maybe the best thing we can do is just to Let Go!
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At Faye Schindelka’s web site, Wisdom-of-Spirit.com, her essay, “Adopting a positive attitude towards life shifts our personal vibration,” is right on target. The following comment she makes is really the central idea of her essay: “By slowing down our pace and savoring each small part of our daily routine, we add a richness to our experience. Best of all, we experience more joy throughout the course of our day.”
At Ezine Articles, the essay, “Negotiating difficult life transitions,” by Garrett Coan, offers 14 different and easy-to-apply coping skills. Coan ends his very worthwhile essay saying: “Times of life transitions offer you the chance to explore what your ideal life would look like. When things are in disarray, you can reflect on the hopes and dreams you once had but perhaps forgot about. Take this time to write about them in a journal or talk about them with a trusted friend or therapist. Now is a good time to take advantage of the fork in the road.”
- - - - - - - -
Copyright June, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
It’s been happening a lot lately. Life transitions are being thrust before me, and I’ve heard that it gets worse as you get older. There have been a number of deaths, some people have entered “care facilities,” and there has been a wedding (one of my two sons, and the last of my four children, got married).
More than five years ago now, I read Gail Sheehy’s Passages (Ballantine Books, 2006), and I have been dramatically affected by it ever since. I never wrote a review of it (I wasn’t writing book reviews at the time), but the first review I found by Bertz “Happier” from Hawaii, at Amazon.com captured my thoughts exactly. This is just the very first part of the review: “Reading Passages by Gail Sheehy was a turning point in my life. I especially remember, ‘The most important words in midlife are — Let Go. Let it happen to you. Let it happen to your partner. Let the feelings. Let the changes.’ ‘You can't take everything with you when you leave on the midlife journey.’ ‘You are moving out of roles and into the self.’”
It’s not that I have been bereft of significant transitions in my own life nor that I did not know how to deal with them. It’s is simply — like many aspects of life — when they happen to you, you think you are the Lone Ranger. That is, you think you are the only one experiencing them and life crises only happen to you. Be quiet and move on with your life! Sheehy’s book is an eye opener only because she serves as a guide, mentor, and significant confidant.
One major transition for me was from being single to being married. When I left for Indiana University to study for my Ph.D., my future wife and I talked about the transition. We decided that for the move we would either be married, or we would split up. There was going to be no long-distance relationship. This was an important transition and contributed significantly to my successful work on my Ph.D. I had no choice except to want to do well, not just for myself, but now for a wife and a future family. Time to get serious. It was as if “life” was shouting: “Grow up now!”
When I moved from Indiana University to the University of Massachusetts, from graduate teaching assistant to instructor then professor, it was a major transition. From being a student to operating as a full-time college teacher can rattle your sensibilities. For twenty years I had only known how to “be a student,” and suddenly, within a four-month time span, I was on the other side solely responsible for my own students. Sure, being a graduate teaching assistant helped ease the transition, introduced me to college teaching, and set a valuable course of action; however, anyone can train, guide, and instruct, but they can’t get into your head and make the transition for you.
There was never a time during my professional life that I wasn’t writing. I published at least five scholarly articles from my dissertation alone — a rather remarkable outcome, I was told. Those successes led to many others (about 96 published articles), but none of my professional writing came close to the transition from unpublished book author to published book author.
I haven’t ever thought about why this was such a worthy transition for me until now. I think there are a number of reasons for it. First, I used between 50 and 100 textbooks (maybe more!) from the beginning of my formal (in class) educational career to when I completed my Ph.D. This fact, alone, put textbook writers on an especially high pedestal. That is because I always took my education seriously, read the books assigned, and performed well above average.
The second reason the transition from article writer to textbook author was significant was the praise I heard for textbook authors. The books we used were often subjects of conversation, the theories espoused were regularly bases for argument, and once I achieved the status of “professor,” books and authors were often compared and discussed. I enjoyed the thought of being the subject of such discussions.
When I interviewed for a position at Bowling Green State University (BGSU) (Spring, 1973), my first textbook (Speech/Communication (Van Nostrand, 1974), co-authored with Saundra Hybels) was just published, and I made it clear in the interview that I wanted to adopt the book for the basic speech course I was being asked to direct. There wasn’t a sign of dissension among those interviewing me — and I specifically looked for it. Actually, in retrospect, having a newly published textbook that satisfied exactly, the format of the course I was being asked to direct, increased my credibility among those faculty members. Not one of them had ever published a textbook.
Because the course I directed was large, and this was my first of a number of textbooks I authored, you would have a difficult time imagining what a thrill it was to see students on campus carrying around my textbook. I was a published, college-textbook author! Quite a transition.
As an aside here, it is that same textbook, with a different title, that is going into its 10th edition (Communicating Effectively, McGraw-Hill, 2012) — a continuous publishing record (counting Speech/Communication, 1974, as the starting point), with this one book, alone, of 38 years!
There have been other transitions, too. Like from having no children to being a parent. Then, the transition from being a parent of children to being a parent of teenagers! And the transition I like least of all is from “adult” to “wise old man” — especially when the emphasis is on “old.”
What I have enjoyed, too (for the most part), is watching our grown children and their children go through life’s transitions. This time, however, you watch with a different perspective since you have done it yourself, and since you are older and wiser now. At least, older!
Life goes on. Likewise, transitions go on, too. What has been especially fun for me is that I have had the opportunity not just to observe all of this, but I have had the thrill of documenting and writing about it. Probably the most important idea in the life transitioning that takes place is being flexible and adaptable, because often transitions cause change — if not physically, at least attitudinally. They cannot be avoided; attitude shifts take place, and life goes on. I think Gail Sheehy had it right. Maybe the best thing we can do is just to Let Go!
- - - - - - - - -
At Faye Schindelka’s web site, Wisdom-of-Spirit.com, her essay, “Adopting a positive attitude towards life shifts our personal vibration,” is right on target. The following comment she makes is really the central idea of her essay: “By slowing down our pace and savoring each small part of our daily routine, we add a richness to our experience. Best of all, we experience more joy throughout the course of our day.”
At Ezine Articles, the essay, “Negotiating difficult life transitions,” by Garrett Coan, offers 14 different and easy-to-apply coping skills. Coan ends his very worthwhile essay saying: “Times of life transitions offer you the chance to explore what your ideal life would look like. When things are in disarray, you can reflect on the hopes and dreams you once had but perhaps forgot about. Take this time to write about them in a journal or talk about them with a trusted friend or therapist. Now is a good time to take advantage of the fork in the road.”
- - - - - - - -
Copyright June, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Thursday, June 14, 2012
Life’s second choices
by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
One of my jobs as a college academic adviser was to answer student questions, ease their transition from high school to college, and offer suggestions regarding course work. Inevitably through my conversations, I would discover that they had come to this college instead of their first choice because of cost (most often), academic ineligibility (they didn’t have the grades), distance (the desired college was too far away), or parental guidance (their parents preferred this choice rather than their first choice). How I addressed their concern about coming to a college that was not their first choice, offers some general parameters regarding how everyone must deal with life’s second choices.
My first response was always the same. How you deal with all areas of life, no matter what it is — or first, second, third, or fourth choices! — comes down to one, singular issue. Life is what you make of it! It depends entirely on your own perception, point of view, and impression. If you let this choice gnaw away at you, erode your spirit, or destroy your enthusiasm and motivation to learn, then there is only one person to blame — yourself!
Human beings, by natural instinct, want to find someone else to blame for their misfortunes. At Sixwise.com, in the essay there that has no author nor date, titled, “How to Take Responsibility & Stop Blaming Others (Even if Others are to Blame),” there is a comment about blaming others: “You know you are not accepting personal responsibility if you do the opposite: blame others for your problems, life situation, hardships, character flaws, and just about everything and anything else. Rather than accepting the ‘blame’ or responsibility for how your life is, you make excuses. Everything and anybody is to blame -- except yourself.”
Let me add something to my comment about perception — life is what you make it. I don’t know whether or not you have discovered it, but all your learning thus far has been up to you. That is, it isn’t parents, teachers, rabbis, ministers or priests who teach you. In the end, you are the teacher. The teacher is inside you; thus, for any learning to occur, it is up to you. You make the decision, you either absorb or reject the information, and you either decide to use it and learn from it, or discard it as un-usable.
There is something else you need to know regarding settling for second choices. In the end — that is, when you graduate from college — few people are concerned about the institution from which you graduated. A college education, too, is what you make of it.
Some people may graduate from an outstanding, well-known, prestigious school, and do nothing with their education. Just the same, some people can graduate from the tiniest college that few people have ever heard about, and go on and do great things. Once again, it is all on an individual’s shoulders. Sure, some people have more connections, resources, or opportunities than others, but the choice of a college seldom is the deciding factor regarding what happens to you after college, how successful you are, or how far you go in life. That, instead, is based on individual responsibility.
What I have discovered regarding a college education, is that there are “great” teachers, wonderful motivators, and inspiring mentors at all levels of education, in all institutions large and small. I went to Indiana University because I had heard about the reputation of one of these “great” teachers (Dr. Robert Gunderson), and I would make exactly the same recommendation to all college students: Talk to other students and faculty members, listen to what they have to say, and pursue “great” instructors based on their reputation or what others say about them. Often, college advisers can assist in these decisions.
There is yet another useful piece of information students need to hear. Colleges are not just about what happens in their classrooms. The social networks that take place on campus are important, and the students you get to know can be valuable both within and after a higher-education experience. Also, because colleges are not just about what happens in the classrooms, students who really want to learn, who consider knowledge acquisition an important part of their college experience, and want to get as much as possible from the time they spend there, have many opportunities to add to their college life.
What can college students do to add to their college experience? First there are always additional readings. Second, there are a large number of experts who can give advice and counsel. Third, there are numerous extracurricular opportunities. Fourth, there are useful work experiences that can dovetail with, complement, and add to any in-class learning that takes place. Fifth, think about student exchanges at either the national or international levels. Students who fail to add to their in-class experiences, fail to take advantage of all that colleges have to offer.
No matter the college, no matter the location, and no matter the size, students who go to college should take advantage of all possible opportunities to broaden their understandings, add to their resume, and strengthen their foundation. This can happen anywhere, anyplace, and with no consideration whether their college was first, second, third, or even their fourth choice.
Another piece of advice I like to give students has to do with flexibility. Those who come in with a specific, well-defined career choice may be restricting their alternatives and opportunities. I found that during the first couple of years of college, having flexibility actually adds to students’ options and choices. That is, few students who come to college for the first time have experienced a broad range of courses like they get in any beginning set of requirements. If they take these with an open-mind, allow receptivity to new ideas and suggestions, and are willing to change, they are far more likely to find a subject or discipline that is best matched to their personality and interests.
Life’s second choices may, at least at first, make a person despondent or sad; but such despondency or sadness should be short lived. Why? Life is short and offers us few “do-overs.” Rather than waste the emotional energy that despondency or sadness require — or any energy devoted to negative emotions — they need to get up, brush themselves off, and begin on a course of action designed to take their best advantage of the hand that has been delivered them. In that way they are not just making positive use of their time and energy, but they are capitalizing on where they are in life and helping themselves move forward toward greater success and opportunity.
- - - - - - - -
At eHow, the essay, “How to Make the Most Out of Your College Education,” (no author and no date) has 15 suggestions for making the most of your college education. They are practical and useful. I thought the comments that followed the brief essay were insightful and interesting.
At BrianKim.net, the essay by Brian Kim, “How to Get the Most Out of College,” (July 26, 2006) includes and discusses ten great suggestions.
Tania K. Cowling has a terrific essay, “How to make the most of your college experience,” at Family TLC, in which she has nine suggestions. Cowling begins her essay saying: “Why do some students have such a wonderful experience in college and others don¡t? Chances are, it¡s not because students picked the right or the wrong college but because they didn¡t make the most of the opportunities available to them at the college they did choose.”
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Copyright June, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
One of my jobs as a college academic adviser was to answer student questions, ease their transition from high school to college, and offer suggestions regarding course work. Inevitably through my conversations, I would discover that they had come to this college instead of their first choice because of cost (most often), academic ineligibility (they didn’t have the grades), distance (the desired college was too far away), or parental guidance (their parents preferred this choice rather than their first choice). How I addressed their concern about coming to a college that was not their first choice, offers some general parameters regarding how everyone must deal with life’s second choices.
My first response was always the same. How you deal with all areas of life, no matter what it is — or first, second, third, or fourth choices! — comes down to one, singular issue. Life is what you make of it! It depends entirely on your own perception, point of view, and impression. If you let this choice gnaw away at you, erode your spirit, or destroy your enthusiasm and motivation to learn, then there is only one person to blame — yourself!
Human beings, by natural instinct, want to find someone else to blame for their misfortunes. At Sixwise.com, in the essay there that has no author nor date, titled, “How to Take Responsibility & Stop Blaming Others (Even if Others are to Blame),” there is a comment about blaming others: “You know you are not accepting personal responsibility if you do the opposite: blame others for your problems, life situation, hardships, character flaws, and just about everything and anything else. Rather than accepting the ‘blame’ or responsibility for how your life is, you make excuses. Everything and anybody is to blame -- except yourself.”
Let me add something to my comment about perception — life is what you make it. I don’t know whether or not you have discovered it, but all your learning thus far has been up to you. That is, it isn’t parents, teachers, rabbis, ministers or priests who teach you. In the end, you are the teacher. The teacher is inside you; thus, for any learning to occur, it is up to you. You make the decision, you either absorb or reject the information, and you either decide to use it and learn from it, or discard it as un-usable.
There is something else you need to know regarding settling for second choices. In the end — that is, when you graduate from college — few people are concerned about the institution from which you graduated. A college education, too, is what you make of it.
Some people may graduate from an outstanding, well-known, prestigious school, and do nothing with their education. Just the same, some people can graduate from the tiniest college that few people have ever heard about, and go on and do great things. Once again, it is all on an individual’s shoulders. Sure, some people have more connections, resources, or opportunities than others, but the choice of a college seldom is the deciding factor regarding what happens to you after college, how successful you are, or how far you go in life. That, instead, is based on individual responsibility.
What I have discovered regarding a college education, is that there are “great” teachers, wonderful motivators, and inspiring mentors at all levels of education, in all institutions large and small. I went to Indiana University because I had heard about the reputation of one of these “great” teachers (Dr. Robert Gunderson), and I would make exactly the same recommendation to all college students: Talk to other students and faculty members, listen to what they have to say, and pursue “great” instructors based on their reputation or what others say about them. Often, college advisers can assist in these decisions.
There is yet another useful piece of information students need to hear. Colleges are not just about what happens in their classrooms. The social networks that take place on campus are important, and the students you get to know can be valuable both within and after a higher-education experience. Also, because colleges are not just about what happens in the classrooms, students who really want to learn, who consider knowledge acquisition an important part of their college experience, and want to get as much as possible from the time they spend there, have many opportunities to add to their college life.
What can college students do to add to their college experience? First there are always additional readings. Second, there are a large number of experts who can give advice and counsel. Third, there are numerous extracurricular opportunities. Fourth, there are useful work experiences that can dovetail with, complement, and add to any in-class learning that takes place. Fifth, think about student exchanges at either the national or international levels. Students who fail to add to their in-class experiences, fail to take advantage of all that colleges have to offer.
No matter the college, no matter the location, and no matter the size, students who go to college should take advantage of all possible opportunities to broaden their understandings, add to their resume, and strengthen their foundation. This can happen anywhere, anyplace, and with no consideration whether their college was first, second, third, or even their fourth choice.
Another piece of advice I like to give students has to do with flexibility. Those who come in with a specific, well-defined career choice may be restricting their alternatives and opportunities. I found that during the first couple of years of college, having flexibility actually adds to students’ options and choices. That is, few students who come to college for the first time have experienced a broad range of courses like they get in any beginning set of requirements. If they take these with an open-mind, allow receptivity to new ideas and suggestions, and are willing to change, they are far more likely to find a subject or discipline that is best matched to their personality and interests.
Life’s second choices may, at least at first, make a person despondent or sad; but such despondency or sadness should be short lived. Why? Life is short and offers us few “do-overs.” Rather than waste the emotional energy that despondency or sadness require — or any energy devoted to negative emotions — they need to get up, brush themselves off, and begin on a course of action designed to take their best advantage of the hand that has been delivered them. In that way they are not just making positive use of their time and energy, but they are capitalizing on where they are in life and helping themselves move forward toward greater success and opportunity.
- - - - - - - -
At eHow, the essay, “How to Make the Most Out of Your College Education,” (no author and no date) has 15 suggestions for making the most of your college education. They are practical and useful. I thought the comments that followed the brief essay were insightful and interesting.
At BrianKim.net, the essay by Brian Kim, “How to Get the Most Out of College,” (July 26, 2006) includes and discusses ten great suggestions.
Tania K. Cowling has a terrific essay, “How to make the most of your college experience,” at Family TLC, in which she has nine suggestions. Cowling begins her essay saying: “Why do some students have such a wonderful experience in college and others don¡t? Chances are, it¡s not because students picked the right or the wrong college but because they didn¡t make the most of the opportunities available to them at the college they did choose.”
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Copyright June, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Thursday, June 7, 2012
Aesthetics: An ordered, well-organized, disciplined life
by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
As I was sitting having breakfast before dawn one morning (on many mornings!), I enjoyed subdued lighting, gentle, comforting music, and a clean, neat relaxing dining room ambiance. Suddenly, as I enjoyed this incredibly satisfying environment, I realized that it was aesthetics — characterized by an appreciation of beauty or good taste — that was engaging my senses and providing the balance that an ordered, well-organized, disciplined life can bring.
At the very top of Abraham Maslow’s original five-stage model of his Hierarchy of Needs (1943-1954) was self-actualization. Below that was esteem, preceded by love/belonging, safety, and physiological needs. Never, in his models did the term aesthetics appear. (N.B. “Although Maslow referred to additional aspects of motivation, 'Cognitive' and 'Aesthetic,' he did not include them as levels or stages within his own expression of the Hierarchy of Needs.” —Source: Chapman, Allen. (n.d.). Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Businessballs.com Retrieved January 30, 2011.
In my ordering of needs I would place aesthetic needs at the pinnacle on Maslow’s Hierarchy — above self-actualization needs. For the most part, it is only after physiological, safety, love/belonging, esteem, and self-actualization needs are fulfilled (whether on purpose or by accident) that people can turn their attention to aesthetic needs — a search for beauty symmetry and closure. I would suggest that most people do not reach this stage; however, I’m certain that those who do attain this (as I believe I have, not to be immodest), they are likely to find it desirable, pleasing, and satisfying. My opening paragraph of this essay demonstrates why, but let me offer several other examples to make my point.
Often, I think it takes a meta-perspective to realize or observe aesthetics in our lives. That is, we must stand outside ourselves as objective observers of our own life to actually see and appreciate it. That is because so often we take it for granted, fail to notice or observe it, or simply disregard it as unimportant. Indifference is, of course, likely if you consider that most of our life has been consumed (to the degree that it has) with the lower needs on Maslow’s Hierarchy. It is possible that those who have not struggled as much are likely to be in the best position to appreciate aesthetics when that time comes in our lives.
Let me give some examples of where (not how) aesthetics can show up in our lives.
As a preface to what I am going to write here, I have to admit one caveat. I am a perfectionist, and there are many times when I regret it (especially when it costs me extra time to achieve the level of perfection I demand of myself!), but the difference between aesthetics and perfectionism is sometimes hard to discern.
I want order in my life, and when I see order, it is pleasing. I was recently leafing through the pictures in the book, Ansel Adams at 100 (Linen Slipcase edition, August 2, 2001). What I noticed in Adams’ pictures was the balance, perspective, and detail. He had the ability to frame a picture to bring out features not seen by the untrained eye. This is what pleased my aesthetic sense.
I am fulfilled in the same manner when I listen to great music. Often, when I eat I have music playing in the background. It doesn’t have to be Mozart, Bach, or Beethoven. I find delightful and satisfying artistry in van Cliburn’s piano playing, Enya’s vocal recordings, and even in the works of James Galway and George Winston. I don’t have to be a critic, offer in-depth analysis, or even understand all of the nuances and intricacies of the music (or artwork, as the case may be) to appreciate it. I like it because it pleases my senses and, thus, my aesthetic needs.
When I read a good book, I get a rich sense of aesthetics. When an author can put words to ideas and construct an outstanding, well-supported narrative, for me there can be no better aesthetic. It is precisely these books that win my approval. It is why, too, that I read so widely (non-fiction only), but it is a continuous search for aesthetic satisfaction. (I post my book reviews every Monday on my blog, and there are more than 100 of my reviews posted at Amazon.com.)
Nature, just as you might think, offers so many opportunities to appease my aesthetic needs. I have traveled around the world and, honestly, the possibilities for aesthetic satisfaction are endless. We went on a waterfall tour in upstate Wisconsin and the Upper Peninsula of Michigan one year, and the variety of waterfalls we saw was staggering — all different sizes and shapes, with quantities of water that varied from dribbles to gushers, and at surroundings that varied from rural and secluded (where we had to hike into a forest to find the falls) to urban (where the falls were located within a city and surrounded by buildings, bridges, or other structures.
We have walked in forests, jungles, and through wetlands. We have been in banana plantations, nutmeg-tree plots, and taro fields. We have visited botanical gardens in Hawaii, on some Caribbean islands, and in Ann Arbor and Toledo. The views have been astounding, the sights staggering, and the variety remarkable.
When we were in Shanghai where the shapes and colors of the buildings were unique, just as the architecture in Columbus, Indiana, catches the eye. Despite the filth and pollution in downtown Saigon (Ho Chi Ming City), the spaghetti snarls of the overhead electrical lines dazzled the imagination. And, in great contrast to Saigon, the cleanliness and size of he buildings in downtown Singapore is astonishing.
One web site that discussed graphic design briefly mentioned aesthetics: “People consider aesthetics as a basic need. They like to work in environments that meet at least basic aesthetic requirements. They dislike ugly environments. As a result, they are more motivated and perform better if their aesthetic needs are met.”
I totally agree with this comment, however, I have also discovered that there is surprising beauty in everything with which we have contact. It may need us to look more closely; it may need us to draw back to see the greater picture. Once we have satisfied the lower-order needs on Maslow’s Hierarchy, the likelihood that we can see and appreciate the aesthetics in everything we encounter becomes more likely. And when we get to that point, we get closer to achieving the balance that an ordered, well-organized, disciplined life can bring.
- - - - - - - -
At wikiHow, the essay there by Rob S, Ben Rubenstein, and Sondra C, “How to Appreciate Modern American Architecture,” offers instructions that could apply to anything we encounter in life.
In an essay at the eHow web site, “What is aesthetic impotence?” Fraser Sherman writes that Fredrich von Schiller, the aesthetic philosopher, said (and he paraphrases him): “He believed that the growth of our capacity to appreciate beauty was linked with the growth of our dignity and freedom as human beings.” Sherman’s essay supports the contention in my essay that we begin to appreciate beauty once we feel secure in the lower-order needs of Maslow’s Hierarchy.
- - - - - - - - -
Copyright June, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
As I was sitting having breakfast before dawn one morning (on many mornings!), I enjoyed subdued lighting, gentle, comforting music, and a clean, neat relaxing dining room ambiance. Suddenly, as I enjoyed this incredibly satisfying environment, I realized that it was aesthetics — characterized by an appreciation of beauty or good taste — that was engaging my senses and providing the balance that an ordered, well-organized, disciplined life can bring.
At the very top of Abraham Maslow’s original five-stage model of his Hierarchy of Needs (1943-1954) was self-actualization. Below that was esteem, preceded by love/belonging, safety, and physiological needs. Never, in his models did the term aesthetics appear. (N.B. “Although Maslow referred to additional aspects of motivation, 'Cognitive' and 'Aesthetic,' he did not include them as levels or stages within his own expression of the Hierarchy of Needs.” —Source: Chapman, Allen. (n.d.). Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. Businessballs.com Retrieved January 30, 2011.
In my ordering of needs I would place aesthetic needs at the pinnacle on Maslow’s Hierarchy — above self-actualization needs. For the most part, it is only after physiological, safety, love/belonging, esteem, and self-actualization needs are fulfilled (whether on purpose or by accident) that people can turn their attention to aesthetic needs — a search for beauty symmetry and closure. I would suggest that most people do not reach this stage; however, I’m certain that those who do attain this (as I believe I have, not to be immodest), they are likely to find it desirable, pleasing, and satisfying. My opening paragraph of this essay demonstrates why, but let me offer several other examples to make my point.
Often, I think it takes a meta-perspective to realize or observe aesthetics in our lives. That is, we must stand outside ourselves as objective observers of our own life to actually see and appreciate it. That is because so often we take it for granted, fail to notice or observe it, or simply disregard it as unimportant. Indifference is, of course, likely if you consider that most of our life has been consumed (to the degree that it has) with the lower needs on Maslow’s Hierarchy. It is possible that those who have not struggled as much are likely to be in the best position to appreciate aesthetics when that time comes in our lives.
Let me give some examples of where (not how) aesthetics can show up in our lives.
As a preface to what I am going to write here, I have to admit one caveat. I am a perfectionist, and there are many times when I regret it (especially when it costs me extra time to achieve the level of perfection I demand of myself!), but the difference between aesthetics and perfectionism is sometimes hard to discern.
I want order in my life, and when I see order, it is pleasing. I was recently leafing through the pictures in the book, Ansel Adams at 100 (Linen Slipcase edition, August 2, 2001). What I noticed in Adams’ pictures was the balance, perspective, and detail. He had the ability to frame a picture to bring out features not seen by the untrained eye. This is what pleased my aesthetic sense.
I am fulfilled in the same manner when I listen to great music. Often, when I eat I have music playing in the background. It doesn’t have to be Mozart, Bach, or Beethoven. I find delightful and satisfying artistry in van Cliburn’s piano playing, Enya’s vocal recordings, and even in the works of James Galway and George Winston. I don’t have to be a critic, offer in-depth analysis, or even understand all of the nuances and intricacies of the music (or artwork, as the case may be) to appreciate it. I like it because it pleases my senses and, thus, my aesthetic needs.
When I read a good book, I get a rich sense of aesthetics. When an author can put words to ideas and construct an outstanding, well-supported narrative, for me there can be no better aesthetic. It is precisely these books that win my approval. It is why, too, that I read so widely (non-fiction only), but it is a continuous search for aesthetic satisfaction. (I post my book reviews every Monday on my blog, and there are more than 100 of my reviews posted at Amazon.com.)
Nature, just as you might think, offers so many opportunities to appease my aesthetic needs. I have traveled around the world and, honestly, the possibilities for aesthetic satisfaction are endless. We went on a waterfall tour in upstate Wisconsin and the Upper Peninsula of Michigan one year, and the variety of waterfalls we saw was staggering — all different sizes and shapes, with quantities of water that varied from dribbles to gushers, and at surroundings that varied from rural and secluded (where we had to hike into a forest to find the falls) to urban (where the falls were located within a city and surrounded by buildings, bridges, or other structures.
We have walked in forests, jungles, and through wetlands. We have been in banana plantations, nutmeg-tree plots, and taro fields. We have visited botanical gardens in Hawaii, on some Caribbean islands, and in Ann Arbor and Toledo. The views have been astounding, the sights staggering, and the variety remarkable.
When we were in Shanghai where the shapes and colors of the buildings were unique, just as the architecture in Columbus, Indiana, catches the eye. Despite the filth and pollution in downtown Saigon (Ho Chi Ming City), the spaghetti snarls of the overhead electrical lines dazzled the imagination. And, in great contrast to Saigon, the cleanliness and size of he buildings in downtown Singapore is astonishing.
One web site that discussed graphic design briefly mentioned aesthetics: “People consider aesthetics as a basic need. They like to work in environments that meet at least basic aesthetic requirements. They dislike ugly environments. As a result, they are more motivated and perform better if their aesthetic needs are met.”
I totally agree with this comment, however, I have also discovered that there is surprising beauty in everything with which we have contact. It may need us to look more closely; it may need us to draw back to see the greater picture. Once we have satisfied the lower-order needs on Maslow’s Hierarchy, the likelihood that we can see and appreciate the aesthetics in everything we encounter becomes more likely. And when we get to that point, we get closer to achieving the balance that an ordered, well-organized, disciplined life can bring.
- - - - - - - -
At wikiHow, the essay there by Rob S, Ben Rubenstein, and Sondra C, “How to Appreciate Modern American Architecture,” offers instructions that could apply to anything we encounter in life.
In an essay at the eHow web site, “What is aesthetic impotence?” Fraser Sherman writes that Fredrich von Schiller, the aesthetic philosopher, said (and he paraphrases him): “He believed that the growth of our capacity to appreciate beauty was linked with the growth of our dignity and freedom as human beings.” Sherman’s essay supports the contention in my essay that we begin to appreciate beauty once we feel secure in the lower-order needs of Maslow’s Hierarchy.
- - - - - - - - -
Copyright June, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
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