by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
When the bus driver unloaded our bicycles in a parking lot at the very top of the mountain just outside Vale, Colorado, I could feel the rush. I felt addicted to excitement, to the adrenaline rush, to the danger inevitably and invariably involved. At that point, we were on our own, and although I was with a friend, we had no intention of going down the mountain together (we never discussed it). The trail was narrow, steep, with numerous curves, other riders traveling in the same direction, and, for me, totally unpredictable. The adrenaline rush of the ride was there for the taking, and I reached out, seized it, took hold of it, and rode it with all the speed my body could deliver. It was a highlight of my life, and the memory is clear, vivid, and energizing to this day. (Thank goodness I didn’t crash!)
It was a double, open cockpit, biplane on a remote, unused runway, surrounded by dense forest, just outside of Dacca, East Pakistan (now Bangladesh). I had studied the instruction material, completed the hours of practice, and it was time (my instructor told me) to fly the plane solo. There was no wind, the sky was blue, and although it was hot and humid, the air provided a natural air conditioning that was invigorating. The idling engine started the rush, but when the wheels left the runway, and I continued to edge the nose up, I felt the full rush. I was on my own, and I was more than just thrilled, I was electrified.
I left the salesroom with a brand new Italian Lambretta motor scooter, and just feeling the power I was sitting on was nearly sufficient, but when I turned up the accelerator with my right hand, and slowly let out the clutch with my left hand and felt the surge, it fired my enthusiasm, and the adrenaline rush was almost incomprehensible. It wasn’t just the power of the motor scooter itself but the control I had over this instrument. I had to take the scooter outside the city limits on a paved, rural, country road to test its power and exert my control. There was no doubt about the power, the control, and the rush.
I had just gotten off the ski lift at one of the ski resorts outside of Vale, Colorado, and I looked down the mountain I was about to ski. Not having skied much in my life, the excitement shook my whole body, but before spending any time appreciating the thrill, I was off down the mountain. No, it wasn’t a black diamond nor was it a ski trail. This was skiing as fast as you wanted to make it. I controlled my speed — knowing that if I was going to fall, a slower speed would better protect my life! — but, at the bottom of the hill I noticed I was very near the lift that would take me back to the top. The adrenaline rush was such that I skied that same hill at least a half-dozen more times.
I experienced nearly the same level of thrill riding the roller coasters at Cedar Point Amusement Park. For me, the roller coasters were the only rides that offered the adrenaline rush I needed. I tried the Demon Drop one time. That so turned my stomach (upside down!), that I could not handle it. It took me at least an hour and maybe more just to recover from one 2-minute (or less!) experience. But the roller coasters, no matter how many times I rode them (I especially enjoyed the duel coasters of the Gemini ride) delivered a sufficient rush that I would finish and get in line again immediately.
White-water rafting on the New River in West Virginia provided a charge. I remember, especially, the “Z” where the white water was at its peak, and the raft banged off the rocks at the sides of the gorge. That experience reminded me of tubing in Zion National park. In one particular area of the river that ran through our campground, the tightness of the opening to get down the river and the speed of the water combined to make the ride the exhilarating effort it was. At the bottom of this rapids area, I would take the rubber tube to the side of the river, quickly disengage myself, and walk rapidly back up the trail along the river to do it all again.
There has been yet another area where an adrenaline rush occurred and that is dancing. My sister taught me how to rock-‘n-roll, and we would do it for audiences at the main hotel in downtown Karachi, West Pakistan, and in Dacca, East Pakistan, as well. Dancing rock-‘n-roll is how my wife and I got to know each other. We do it on every cruise we take, at my son’s annual Barn Jam, at every New Year’s Eve dance, and at parties and wedding receptions. It has been a regular, satisfying, and even gratifying rush.
Now you see the pattern. Whenever there has been an opportunity, the proper set of circumstances, an option, or opening, I would jump in with both feet — even if it meant floundering a bit — accept whatever risk necessary, and seize the moment. It was that willingness to leap, that inclination to pounce that produced the adrenaline rush. Often, I didn’t even know what the driving force was! In retrospect, it was pure adrenaline!
It was these experiences — along with a number of others, to be sure — that led me to make one of the most adrenaline-laden decisions of my life. I’m not totally sure why I applied for the job as basic speech-communication course director (actually, I know exactly why!), but when I discovered that I would be lecturing to 1,000+ students each week for 15 weeks in a row, I felt a rush. But that rush was nothing when compared with the rush I experienced every time I walked into the lecture hall and prepared myself both physically and psychologically to give a 50-minute lecture. To hold the attention of 300+ freshmen and sophomore university students (no venue on campus was large enough to hold all 1,000 students) for 50 uninterrupted minutes was one of the biggest challenges, responsibilities, and power-trips of my professional life.
When you realize that having to give a public speech is one of the most fearful, adrenaline producing activities that humans engage in, just imagine doing it five times a week for 22 years! It is true that I asked for it, but asking for it does not mean that the fear doesn’t or won’t exist — or even that it will eventually go away. It was as if I chose a job where I could ride a bicycle at top speed down a small mountain pathway, fly a small open-cockpit biplane solo, or drive a powerful, luxury Italian motor scooter at top speed every week for over twenty years. The rush was unimaginable to this day!
There are, of course, many ways to get a similar adrenaline rush, but for me these have been some of the most impressive. Hey, when you know how to get it, enjoy getting it, then who needs drugs or alcohol? I’m not an addict, I have never been one, and I don’t intend to become one, but the adrenaline rush provides a great natural high that is truly fulfilling.
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At wikiHow, in the essay, “How to Get an Adrenaline Rush,” Sharon, Derrick Hensley, Carolyn Barratt, Teresa, and many others, offer six methods. As part of their first paragraph, they write, “Nothing can beat the thrill and excitement experienced when faced with highly stressful and dangerous situations and adrenaline is what causes the excitement.Adrenaline,also termed as the fight or flight hormone, is responsible for the elevated heart rate,dilated blood vessels and increased glucose levels,its that which gives us the temporary feeling of being high.”
At Health QA, the article is titled, “Is an adrenaline rush good?” The most important finding at this web site is this: “Researchers at Texas A&M University found that adventure sports such as rock climbing and white-water canoeing call up more cortisol and epinephrine -- more commonly known as adrenaline -- than public speaking, the acknowledged champion of redline stress reactions. And in this case, that's a good thing. That's because activities that are physically and mentally stressful help your body react better to stress in everyday life -- if they meet three qualifications:They're dangerous, involving the risk of death.They're unpredictable, requiring your brain to adjust to changing conditions.And they're social, increasing the pressure to perform well, whether it's for teammates or spectators.”
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Copyright September, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing, L.L.C.
Thursday, September 27, 2012
Thursday, September 20, 2012
Seventh Anniversary (of writing essays for the blog)
by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
This is truly hard to believe — but I say this every year! A seventh anniversary means the completion of about 364 essays and 364,000 words! Had you asked me when I started whether I would reach this goal, the answer would have been an emphatic, “No way!” I didn’t think it would be possible to make it for a single year, much less seven.
There are several observations I can share after seven years of writing essays. The first is that I have discovered the best time of the year for me with respect to getting writing accomplished (composing essays) is January, February, and March. Following the completion of reading my tenth-edition (Communicating Effectively, 10e (McGraw-Hill, 2012) proof copy (January 14, 2011), I wrote all 52 essays for 2012 before April 1, 2011. Now, that doesn’t mean there won’t be others nor that there won’t be changes or that the order has been decided. I always reserve room for further development.
Another thing I have discovered is that the very best time for writing essays is when I am most moved to write them. The excitement I have about a topic can wane quickly, so to capture the stimulation means writing when the passion, pleasure, and delight are at their peak. On our Southeast Asia cruise, for example, I was fortunate to have a sea day (call that a “free” day) to write after each port visit, so while the thrill was there, and while the specific facts, views, and experiences were fresh, I would compose the essay. (The seventeen essays that covered our Southeast Asia trip were posted beginning in March, 2011, and continued for four months.)
Excitement is insufficient to sustain an essay. Passion is great, but it takes more than that to complete an essay.
I enjoy writing my essays when I am traveling for several reasons. The first is that I take my trips off as business expenses — so there is some (although quite limited) monetary gain involved. Second, the material is fresh and keeps my mind active. Third, when I write out my essays long hand, I have time to think through my information. It is a slower process than when I write on the computer. (I have no laptop, and I take no PC with me when I travel.) Fourth, when I write out my essays long hand, I bring them home and type them into my computer. This process is incredibly important for it is at this point I am able to polish, edit, and change my material. The essay is strengthened considerably by this process.
There is another process that comes into play when I type my information into the computer. So often, I do not know a great deal about some of the things I write about. That is, I have no background or history of what I observe. When I type material into the computer, I am able to do some serious research. For example, when we were on the island of St. Lucia, my wife and I were introduced to the casava cake — about which I wanted to write but knew little. When I Googled casava cake I not only found out the ingredients but discovered, too, the casava cake’s etymology, how to bake them, and where they are popular. It was, indeed, a casava-cake education!
One of the ancillary benefits of this process of writing essays is the education I gain along the way. For example, I never knew as much as I do now about each of the places we visited on our Southeast Asia trip nor about the island of St. Lucia where we stayed for a week. I am learning so much!
Although learning was not one of the motivations for writing essays, it has proven to be rewarding. I was a very good student in school, and I never had to push myself to work — complete papers, finish reports, or do my homework.
Perhaps, the part of my education that I disliked most was working in groups. I always preferred independent work. Why? Because I discovered quite early in my schooling that group members, in general, were lazy. Rather than do their share of the work, often they would depend on the hardworking members and derive their grade because of them. Never wanting to sacrifice a group grade because of the laziness of those with whom I had to work, I was always one of those hardworking, prolific, productive, and energetic members. I never thought of it as serving as a cover for lazy members, I was eager to save my own neck!
In seven years of writing essays I have discovered there are some topics that are repeated, but I have discovered, as well, that it doesn’t matter to me. Why? Simply because I am an evolving, changing, thinking, creative person and, thus, I seldom look back to what I have written before. I write essays on topics I am inspired about at the time, and my thoughts change; whether an essay is duplicated or not doesn’t concern me.
I go through very fertile times — like January through March, as mentioned above. During that time, I come up with numerous new subject areas, and I have found that my best way of capturing (writing about) those topics is to write them down when they occur to me. For that reason, I have note paper in my bathroom. Often when I am exercising before jogging three days a week, I will abruptly stop what I am doing, rush upstairs, and write down the topic.
When I was driving to the Maumee Public Library (part of the Lucas County Public Library system), I thought of the title for my collection of travel essays (Exotic Destinations). It came to me out of the blue, and I wasn’t thinking directly about that forthcoming book at all. This is often the way a subject, title, approach, or way of saying something occurs — unheralded and unannounced. What I have to do is be ready — prepared to capture it at once. When I wait, the idea may not occur again, or it may even come back but in a new form.
The most fascinating thing to me about writing 364 essays is that I have even been able to come up with that many topics. I have seldom had to search or dig deeply. Now, I admit, I peruse a number of news magazines each week, and I read a minimum of two newspapers every day, plus I review books (one book is reviewed weekly on my blog); thus, I am bombarded by new and refreshing ideas on a regular basis. I am truly delighted by and accepting of all kinds of information — and my travels simply add to all this material.
I am thrilled to have a blog. I love writing essays, and I am pleased to be able to share my thoughts, ideas, and emotions with others. If this wasn’t true, I would bring all of this to an end. If you — my readers — have any ideas to add, or if there are topics you would enjoy seeing me write about, please contact me. I always love hearing from my readers.
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“The importance of celebrating your anniversary,” is an essay at ArticleSnatch.com. One of the comments in the article reads as follows: “Celebrating anniversaries can be one of the best ways to keep the spark alive in your relationship. When you remember where you've been and all the hard times you've gotten through together will be easy to hold, a series of anniversary ideas that come to mind.” Yes, it’s about relationship; my writing is designed to promote a relationship between my readers and me, so it’s not that far off!
Susan Leigh, counsellor and hypnotherapist, has an essay, “The Importance of Anniversaries” in which she begins her essay saying: “Anniversaries are an important opportunity to stop and take time to reflect on the significance of a particular person, day or time in our life.” She ends her essay with a comment that reflects where I am in essay writing: “We can take the time on these days [anniversaries] to value what we have done, appreciate how courageous we have been and give ourselves credit for our achievements.”
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Copyright September, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
This is truly hard to believe — but I say this every year! A seventh anniversary means the completion of about 364 essays and 364,000 words! Had you asked me when I started whether I would reach this goal, the answer would have been an emphatic, “No way!” I didn’t think it would be possible to make it for a single year, much less seven.
There are several observations I can share after seven years of writing essays. The first is that I have discovered the best time of the year for me with respect to getting writing accomplished (composing essays) is January, February, and March. Following the completion of reading my tenth-edition (Communicating Effectively, 10e (McGraw-Hill, 2012) proof copy (January 14, 2011), I wrote all 52 essays for 2012 before April 1, 2011. Now, that doesn’t mean there won’t be others nor that there won’t be changes or that the order has been decided. I always reserve room for further development.
Another thing I have discovered is that the very best time for writing essays is when I am most moved to write them. The excitement I have about a topic can wane quickly, so to capture the stimulation means writing when the passion, pleasure, and delight are at their peak. On our Southeast Asia cruise, for example, I was fortunate to have a sea day (call that a “free” day) to write after each port visit, so while the thrill was there, and while the specific facts, views, and experiences were fresh, I would compose the essay. (The seventeen essays that covered our Southeast Asia trip were posted beginning in March, 2011, and continued for four months.)
Excitement is insufficient to sustain an essay. Passion is great, but it takes more than that to complete an essay.
I enjoy writing my essays when I am traveling for several reasons. The first is that I take my trips off as business expenses — so there is some (although quite limited) monetary gain involved. Second, the material is fresh and keeps my mind active. Third, when I write out my essays long hand, I have time to think through my information. It is a slower process than when I write on the computer. (I have no laptop, and I take no PC with me when I travel.) Fourth, when I write out my essays long hand, I bring them home and type them into my computer. This process is incredibly important for it is at this point I am able to polish, edit, and change my material. The essay is strengthened considerably by this process.
There is another process that comes into play when I type my information into the computer. So often, I do not know a great deal about some of the things I write about. That is, I have no background or history of what I observe. When I type material into the computer, I am able to do some serious research. For example, when we were on the island of St. Lucia, my wife and I were introduced to the casava cake — about which I wanted to write but knew little. When I Googled casava cake I not only found out the ingredients but discovered, too, the casava cake’s etymology, how to bake them, and where they are popular. It was, indeed, a casava-cake education!
One of the ancillary benefits of this process of writing essays is the education I gain along the way. For example, I never knew as much as I do now about each of the places we visited on our Southeast Asia trip nor about the island of St. Lucia where we stayed for a week. I am learning so much!
Although learning was not one of the motivations for writing essays, it has proven to be rewarding. I was a very good student in school, and I never had to push myself to work — complete papers, finish reports, or do my homework.
Perhaps, the part of my education that I disliked most was working in groups. I always preferred independent work. Why? Because I discovered quite early in my schooling that group members, in general, were lazy. Rather than do their share of the work, often they would depend on the hardworking members and derive their grade because of them. Never wanting to sacrifice a group grade because of the laziness of those with whom I had to work, I was always one of those hardworking, prolific, productive, and energetic members. I never thought of it as serving as a cover for lazy members, I was eager to save my own neck!
In seven years of writing essays I have discovered there are some topics that are repeated, but I have discovered, as well, that it doesn’t matter to me. Why? Simply because I am an evolving, changing, thinking, creative person and, thus, I seldom look back to what I have written before. I write essays on topics I am inspired about at the time, and my thoughts change; whether an essay is duplicated or not doesn’t concern me.
I go through very fertile times — like January through March, as mentioned above. During that time, I come up with numerous new subject areas, and I have found that my best way of capturing (writing about) those topics is to write them down when they occur to me. For that reason, I have note paper in my bathroom. Often when I am exercising before jogging three days a week, I will abruptly stop what I am doing, rush upstairs, and write down the topic.
When I was driving to the Maumee Public Library (part of the Lucas County Public Library system), I thought of the title for my collection of travel essays (Exotic Destinations). It came to me out of the blue, and I wasn’t thinking directly about that forthcoming book at all. This is often the way a subject, title, approach, or way of saying something occurs — unheralded and unannounced. What I have to do is be ready — prepared to capture it at once. When I wait, the idea may not occur again, or it may even come back but in a new form.
The most fascinating thing to me about writing 364 essays is that I have even been able to come up with that many topics. I have seldom had to search or dig deeply. Now, I admit, I peruse a number of news magazines each week, and I read a minimum of two newspapers every day, plus I review books (one book is reviewed weekly on my blog); thus, I am bombarded by new and refreshing ideas on a regular basis. I am truly delighted by and accepting of all kinds of information — and my travels simply add to all this material.
I am thrilled to have a blog. I love writing essays, and I am pleased to be able to share my thoughts, ideas, and emotions with others. If this wasn’t true, I would bring all of this to an end. If you — my readers — have any ideas to add, or if there are topics you would enjoy seeing me write about, please contact me. I always love hearing from my readers.
- - - - - -
“The importance of celebrating your anniversary,” is an essay at ArticleSnatch.com. One of the comments in the article reads as follows: “Celebrating anniversaries can be one of the best ways to keep the spark alive in your relationship. When you remember where you've been and all the hard times you've gotten through together will be easy to hold, a series of anniversary ideas that come to mind.” Yes, it’s about relationship; my writing is designed to promote a relationship between my readers and me, so it’s not that far off!
Susan Leigh, counsellor and hypnotherapist, has an essay, “The Importance of Anniversaries” in which she begins her essay saying: “Anniversaries are an important opportunity to stop and take time to reflect on the significance of a particular person, day or time in our life.” She ends her essay with a comment that reflects where I am in essay writing: “We can take the time on these days [anniversaries] to value what we have done, appreciate how courageous we have been and give ourselves credit for our achievements.”
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Copyright September, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Thursday, September 13, 2012
Standing on the sidelines --- with wisdom!
by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
It’s not quite the same as sitting in the gymnasium bleachers watching your grandson play basketball and seeing — before the children (3rd and 4th graders) — the appropriate moves, possible openings, or potential plays. It requires little skill or wisdom to be a bleachers-sitter at a kids’ basketball game, true, but it was during one of the basketball games that it came to me: How wonderful — after a lifetime of education, knowledge, and experience — to stand (or sit!) on the sidelines with wisdom.
It’s true that “wisdom” is hard to define. One online dictionary defined it as “knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgment as to action; sagacity, discernment, or insight.” The problem with the definition is simply that it is difficult to really know that you or anyone else has wisdom. And even more difficult, when you compare people who have “wisdom,” you wonder who possesses the divine intelligence to render truth and correctness — if it exists or is even important?
If there was ever a better defense of or justification for a complete formal education, a lifetime program of reading, keeping up with and understanding what is going on in the world, I claim this is it: being able to stand on the sidelines with wisdom. Some examples here might show you what I mean.
Individually, I look at all the decisions we are faced with whether it is how to invest, save, or prepare for retirement, decide on where to travel, for how long, and when, or simply methods for doing various household, automobile, or technological repairs. It is a little like knowing that you have enough tools available to deal with all that life delivers.
Knowing that you have “wisdom” — done everything in life that you could to develop it — helps by giving me the belief in myself, trust in my abilities, confidence and self-assurance, and even the courage and boldness to take action based on what I know. Standing on the sidelines of myself — as a meta-observer of my own life! — the judgment about whether a decision was “wise” or not is a regular, ongoing assessment. I consider part of the daily entertainment fest that keeps me interested in living.
Within the family, at the most immediate level for some, “wisdom” is delightful (at least most of the time) to stand on the sidelines and observe the way in which your children are running their lives or raising their children. I am not talking about interfering — just observing — however, it is especially gratifying to be asked (occasionally!) for advice and being able to gently give it. It is as if your “wisdom” is being recognized and even, perhaps, appreciated. It isn’t necessary, just nice.
At the community level, having “wisdom” helps, too. You watch your community, for example, producing zoning decisions (making huge apartment and condo projects possible), allowing various enterprises (casinos) to build, or countries (China) to enter the local business community, and you analyze the thinking, assess the decisions, re-evaluate the solutions, and your “wisdom” sets in motion a whole different point of view, paves the way for a contrary perspective, and opens the door to new ways of thinking.
You may think, at this point, that situations like this would be frustrating — thinking but not being able to act, but you’re wrong. It is being resolved to stand on the sidelines. You have had your time in the limelight; you have earned your stripes (your “wisdom”); and you have formally agreed (with yourself if not with others) that you are retired! It is the same determination you used to lay the groundwork for “wisdom,” the same tenacity necessary to forge a career, and the same persistence needed to establish your resume and stock a life full of acceptable accomplishments and achievements.
One of my most enjoyable experiences is watching politics take place and unfold on a national level. Talk about standing of the sidelines with wisdom! Seeing some of the wasteful proposals, the silly and extravagant grandstanding, the incredible waste of taxpayer time and money is beyond comprehension. You could say, “But, I’m not interested in politics.” And, as a citizen, you should be ashamed. Not only does it affect each of us on a daily basis, but it dominates the news, absorbs a great deal of our money, offers unending amusement and entertainment, and plays out as a picture much bigger than the largest IMAX screen.
The characters at play in the national political theater are often as evil as lago, the villain in Shakespeare’s “Othello,” as funny as John Belushi as Bluto in “Animal House,” or as hilarious as Groucho, Harpo, Zeppo and Chico Marx in the 1933 classic “Duck Soup.”
There is no end to the application of “wisdom” for, as I have noted, it governs every decision made on a daily basis as well as has influence on all perceptions on all things that impinge on our lives. You never need to wonder why education, experience, and knowledge is so important. It is through our education, experience, and knowledge that we learn “how — how to think, how to learn what we need to learn, how to accomplish, how to connect, how to meditate, how to contemplate and how to love: to get, feel and keep love,” as it says at the web site, Surrenderworks.com, in the essay, “Applying the Wisdom Process to Learning the Wisdom Process.”
It isn’t just the learning itself, it is the stimulus we get from education, experience, and knowledge to go beyond, to extend ourselves, to keep learning and then some. That is precisely what it’s all about. Those who say, once they have graduated from college, “I’m finished with reading,” or “I’m all done with learning now, and I can get on with my life.” This is anathema to everything education stands for or represents — anathema to the purpose (stated or unstated) of what everyone should gain from education.
“Wisdom” does not guarantee that you won’t make errors or have failures; “wisdom” guarantees nothing! But, what it does is provide the mettle — strength of character, moral fiber, determined resolve, and courageousness — that adds character, fortitude, and spirit to the personality. It’s a little like the answer to the question, “Why do you do body-building exercises?” The answer is clear: It adds tone to the body. “Wisdom” adds tone to the personality, color to viewpoints, flavor to decision-making, and quality to life. Wisdom is what makes standing on the sidelines so insightful, worthwhile — and entertaining! And, most important, standing on the sidelines with wisdom is what makes a life.
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At Surrenderworks.com, the essay, “Applying the Wisdom Process to Learning the Wisdom Process,” answers the question, “What is wisdom?” It is immensely interesting and incredibly relevant.
At InFocus (at the Wellness Institute), Peter Robinson has a brief essay, “The Application of Wisdom,” that is short, practical, and to the point. Robinson concludes the essay saying, “It’s the moment that we are able to embody the wisdom we have learned to such a great degree that we can explain it in our own terms, our own way, our own metaphors. We are no longer parroting, or imitating what we’ve been taught. We have become the lesson.”
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Copyright September, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
It’s not quite the same as sitting in the gymnasium bleachers watching your grandson play basketball and seeing — before the children (3rd and 4th graders) — the appropriate moves, possible openings, or potential plays. It requires little skill or wisdom to be a bleachers-sitter at a kids’ basketball game, true, but it was during one of the basketball games that it came to me: How wonderful — after a lifetime of education, knowledge, and experience — to stand (or sit!) on the sidelines with wisdom.
It’s true that “wisdom” is hard to define. One online dictionary defined it as “knowledge of what is true or right coupled with just judgment as to action; sagacity, discernment, or insight.” The problem with the definition is simply that it is difficult to really know that you or anyone else has wisdom. And even more difficult, when you compare people who have “wisdom,” you wonder who possesses the divine intelligence to render truth and correctness — if it exists or is even important?
If there was ever a better defense of or justification for a complete formal education, a lifetime program of reading, keeping up with and understanding what is going on in the world, I claim this is it: being able to stand on the sidelines with wisdom. Some examples here might show you what I mean.
Individually, I look at all the decisions we are faced with whether it is how to invest, save, or prepare for retirement, decide on where to travel, for how long, and when, or simply methods for doing various household, automobile, or technological repairs. It is a little like knowing that you have enough tools available to deal with all that life delivers.
Knowing that you have “wisdom” — done everything in life that you could to develop it — helps by giving me the belief in myself, trust in my abilities, confidence and self-assurance, and even the courage and boldness to take action based on what I know. Standing on the sidelines of myself — as a meta-observer of my own life! — the judgment about whether a decision was “wise” or not is a regular, ongoing assessment. I consider part of the daily entertainment fest that keeps me interested in living.
Within the family, at the most immediate level for some, “wisdom” is delightful (at least most of the time) to stand on the sidelines and observe the way in which your children are running their lives or raising their children. I am not talking about interfering — just observing — however, it is especially gratifying to be asked (occasionally!) for advice and being able to gently give it. It is as if your “wisdom” is being recognized and even, perhaps, appreciated. It isn’t necessary, just nice.
At the community level, having “wisdom” helps, too. You watch your community, for example, producing zoning decisions (making huge apartment and condo projects possible), allowing various enterprises (casinos) to build, or countries (China) to enter the local business community, and you analyze the thinking, assess the decisions, re-evaluate the solutions, and your “wisdom” sets in motion a whole different point of view, paves the way for a contrary perspective, and opens the door to new ways of thinking.
You may think, at this point, that situations like this would be frustrating — thinking but not being able to act, but you’re wrong. It is being resolved to stand on the sidelines. You have had your time in the limelight; you have earned your stripes (your “wisdom”); and you have formally agreed (with yourself if not with others) that you are retired! It is the same determination you used to lay the groundwork for “wisdom,” the same tenacity necessary to forge a career, and the same persistence needed to establish your resume and stock a life full of acceptable accomplishments and achievements.
One of my most enjoyable experiences is watching politics take place and unfold on a national level. Talk about standing of the sidelines with wisdom! Seeing some of the wasteful proposals, the silly and extravagant grandstanding, the incredible waste of taxpayer time and money is beyond comprehension. You could say, “But, I’m not interested in politics.” And, as a citizen, you should be ashamed. Not only does it affect each of us on a daily basis, but it dominates the news, absorbs a great deal of our money, offers unending amusement and entertainment, and plays out as a picture much bigger than the largest IMAX screen.
The characters at play in the national political theater are often as evil as lago, the villain in Shakespeare’s “Othello,” as funny as John Belushi as Bluto in “Animal House,” or as hilarious as Groucho, Harpo, Zeppo and Chico Marx in the 1933 classic “Duck Soup.”
There is no end to the application of “wisdom” for, as I have noted, it governs every decision made on a daily basis as well as has influence on all perceptions on all things that impinge on our lives. You never need to wonder why education, experience, and knowledge is so important. It is through our education, experience, and knowledge that we learn “how — how to think, how to learn what we need to learn, how to accomplish, how to connect, how to meditate, how to contemplate and how to love: to get, feel and keep love,” as it says at the web site, Surrenderworks.com, in the essay, “Applying the Wisdom Process to Learning the Wisdom Process.”
It isn’t just the learning itself, it is the stimulus we get from education, experience, and knowledge to go beyond, to extend ourselves, to keep learning and then some. That is precisely what it’s all about. Those who say, once they have graduated from college, “I’m finished with reading,” or “I’m all done with learning now, and I can get on with my life.” This is anathema to everything education stands for or represents — anathema to the purpose (stated or unstated) of what everyone should gain from education.
“Wisdom” does not guarantee that you won’t make errors or have failures; “wisdom” guarantees nothing! But, what it does is provide the mettle — strength of character, moral fiber, determined resolve, and courageousness — that adds character, fortitude, and spirit to the personality. It’s a little like the answer to the question, “Why do you do body-building exercises?” The answer is clear: It adds tone to the body. “Wisdom” adds tone to the personality, color to viewpoints, flavor to decision-making, and quality to life. Wisdom is what makes standing on the sidelines so insightful, worthwhile — and entertaining! And, most important, standing on the sidelines with wisdom is what makes a life.
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At Surrenderworks.com, the essay, “Applying the Wisdom Process to Learning the Wisdom Process,” answers the question, “What is wisdom?” It is immensely interesting and incredibly relevant.
At InFocus (at the Wellness Institute), Peter Robinson has a brief essay, “The Application of Wisdom,” that is short, practical, and to the point. Robinson concludes the essay saying, “It’s the moment that we are able to embody the wisdom we have learned to such a great degree that we can explain it in our own terms, our own way, our own metaphors. We are no longer parroting, or imitating what we’ve been taught. We have become the lesson.”
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Copyright September, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Thursday, September 6, 2012
The importance of great expectations
by Richard L. Weaver II, Ph.D.
Throughout my life, I have always expected good things to happen. It could be a result of my family, education, or many experiences, but I think it may be something else. From a very early age — as far back as I can remember — I always did well in school. For all the home work and preparation I did for my classes, I was continually rewarded positively. This buoyed my confidence, of course, but also, it propelled me to continue in the same direction. Positive results provide a template for continued similar performance.
I would read, explore, and learn with a great deal of interest and enthusiasm. I was what some teachers defined as “a teacher’s student” — well liked, confident, active, involved, and informed.
I can’t remember ever engaging in a new project or taking on a new task when I did not have great expectations going in — great expectations not just for getting through the project or task but getting through with excellence. I’m an extremely competitive person; however, I was so confident in my skills and abilities, that throughout my education, I seldom worried about others. I didn’t have to compete, for I knew (at the outset) I would excel.
What I have discovered is that the worldview you adopt — having great expectations for success — can affect every aspect of your life. It doesn’t matter when or where it happens nor does it matter the stimulus. Suddenly (perhaps it is an evolving reality! you expect good things to happen in every facet of your life from health, personal and family relationships, to friends, career, and abundant prosperity.
Great expectations become a self-fulfilling prophecy. They have the power to alter your actions and, thus, come true. Put another way, if you don't have great expectations, they are less likely to happen.
I knew, for several examples of self-fulfilling prophecies, that when I first took swimming lessons, that I would succeed and learn to swim. (I followed with swim-team competitions, and all of the American Red Cross lifesaving classes.) I knew that as a youngster, when I would sell pot holders door-to-door, that I would be successful. (I sold out.) I knew that if I wanted to befriend someone, he or she (mostly females), would become my friend. (I had a large number of female friends.) I knew that when I ran for student council, that I would serve on the council. (I did for 3 years.)
Were there failures? Of course. But, great expectations can guide your losses just as they do your victories. That is, when I ran for president of the student body in high school, I took the loss in stride. It was a positive loss (never one where I considered myself a failure), and considering the responsibilities tied to the position — which I did not know about prior to running — winning the office would have been a serious detriment to my studies.
When I didn’t get tenure at the University of Massachusetts, it was a blow to my ego and to my self-confidence, it is true. Considering the other senior faculty members at Massachusetts who duplicated my expertise and credentials, I knew there was no way to succeed there. In that discharge, however, I never lost great expectations. I believed that a new position would increase my opportunities and successes., and when I won the interview and landed a job at Bowling Green State University, it was the fulfillment of a dream.
Having two teachers for parents, it was not a surprise that I would pursue teaching as a career (after changing from pre-medicine). But, when I set my goal to be a teacher, I wanted to influence as many students as I could. That was the very same goal I had as I started writing college textbooks; they were simply an extension of my teaching. What better teaching position could I have acquired than directing a large, basic, speech-communication course? Talk about having influence! (I taught over 80,000 students in my career as a teacher.)
Speaking of writing college textbooks, that exercise, too, resulted from great expectations. I was first asked to write by a student-colleague of mine at the University of Michigan, but when I said yes to her, I really had no doubt the book, Speech/Communication (Van Nostrand, 1974) would be a success. Van Nostrand’s list was purchased by Random House, and the same book was re-named (by me!), Communicating Effectively and went through several editions until McGraw-Hill purchased the Random House list, and the book became one of their best sellers and has gone through ten editions! (12 editions counting the first two editions of the first book) Talk about successful great expectations!
Have there been failures in my writing? Of course. Based on my success with the books mentioned in the previous paragraph, I wrote two for the publishing company, Prentice-Hall. With the exception of one called Research in Speech Communication which I wrote with Raymond K. Tucker (senior author because of his seniority), and Cynthia Berryman-Fink, and sold well, I had two books, Understanding Public Communication and Understanding Business Communication that went nowhere.
Offsetting these two failures, I had wonderful success with a HarperCollins textbook, Understanding Interpersonal Communication that went through seven editions. I was writing these textbooks, writing close to 100 academic articles, giving speeches, and directing a basic speech-communication course all at the same time. For me, it was a gratifying fulfillment and, at the same time, anecdotal proof that a worldview of great expectations works.
In relationships, great expectations offered numerous opportunities to date and then find a relationship partner with whom I have lived for more than 45 years. They (great expectations) supplied a family life that has been truly exceptional, supportive, encouraging, and positive.
If I were to suggest a bottom line to this essay, I would end in the way I began: “From a very early age — as far back as I can remember — I always did well in school. For all the home work and preparation I did for my classes, I was continually rewarded positively. This buoyed my confidence, of course, but also, it propelled me to continue in the same direction.
Positive results provide a template for continued similar performance.” I truly believe that success in school, for me, is what allowed or prompted, if you will, the production of (or adoption of the worldview) great expectations. And it is those great expectations that have, on a continuing basis, resulted in the great successes I have experienced.
- - - - - - - - - -
Jason Osborn, at web site EzineArticles, has a brief essay, “Great Life - How to Live Your Life Full of Happiness and Success,” that offers three suggestions: 1) Do what makes you happy, 2) Create successful habits, and 3) Learn to enjoy life.
From the Associated Content from Yahoo web site, in the essay, “Five Steps to Live a Happy and Successful Life” (February 8, 2006), JS Anandrahi offers five rules. They are the rule of 1) priority, 2) learning, 3) sincerity, 4) discipline, and 5) change.
- - - - - - - -
Copyright September, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
Throughout my life, I have always expected good things to happen. It could be a result of my family, education, or many experiences, but I think it may be something else. From a very early age — as far back as I can remember — I always did well in school. For all the home work and preparation I did for my classes, I was continually rewarded positively. This buoyed my confidence, of course, but also, it propelled me to continue in the same direction. Positive results provide a template for continued similar performance.
I would read, explore, and learn with a great deal of interest and enthusiasm. I was what some teachers defined as “a teacher’s student” — well liked, confident, active, involved, and informed.
I can’t remember ever engaging in a new project or taking on a new task when I did not have great expectations going in — great expectations not just for getting through the project or task but getting through with excellence. I’m an extremely competitive person; however, I was so confident in my skills and abilities, that throughout my education, I seldom worried about others. I didn’t have to compete, for I knew (at the outset) I would excel.
What I have discovered is that the worldview you adopt — having great expectations for success — can affect every aspect of your life. It doesn’t matter when or where it happens nor does it matter the stimulus. Suddenly (perhaps it is an evolving reality! you expect good things to happen in every facet of your life from health, personal and family relationships, to friends, career, and abundant prosperity.
Great expectations become a self-fulfilling prophecy. They have the power to alter your actions and, thus, come true. Put another way, if you don't have great expectations, they are less likely to happen.
I knew, for several examples of self-fulfilling prophecies, that when I first took swimming lessons, that I would succeed and learn to swim. (I followed with swim-team competitions, and all of the American Red Cross lifesaving classes.) I knew that as a youngster, when I would sell pot holders door-to-door, that I would be successful. (I sold out.) I knew that if I wanted to befriend someone, he or she (mostly females), would become my friend. (I had a large number of female friends.) I knew that when I ran for student council, that I would serve on the council. (I did for 3 years.)
Were there failures? Of course. But, great expectations can guide your losses just as they do your victories. That is, when I ran for president of the student body in high school, I took the loss in stride. It was a positive loss (never one where I considered myself a failure), and considering the responsibilities tied to the position — which I did not know about prior to running — winning the office would have been a serious detriment to my studies.
When I didn’t get tenure at the University of Massachusetts, it was a blow to my ego and to my self-confidence, it is true. Considering the other senior faculty members at Massachusetts who duplicated my expertise and credentials, I knew there was no way to succeed there. In that discharge, however, I never lost great expectations. I believed that a new position would increase my opportunities and successes., and when I won the interview and landed a job at Bowling Green State University, it was the fulfillment of a dream.
Having two teachers for parents, it was not a surprise that I would pursue teaching as a career (after changing from pre-medicine). But, when I set my goal to be a teacher, I wanted to influence as many students as I could. That was the very same goal I had as I started writing college textbooks; they were simply an extension of my teaching. What better teaching position could I have acquired than directing a large, basic, speech-communication course? Talk about having influence! (I taught over 80,000 students in my career as a teacher.)
Speaking of writing college textbooks, that exercise, too, resulted from great expectations. I was first asked to write by a student-colleague of mine at the University of Michigan, but when I said yes to her, I really had no doubt the book, Speech/Communication (Van Nostrand, 1974) would be a success. Van Nostrand’s list was purchased by Random House, and the same book was re-named (by me!), Communicating Effectively and went through several editions until McGraw-Hill purchased the Random House list, and the book became one of their best sellers and has gone through ten editions! (12 editions counting the first two editions of the first book) Talk about successful great expectations!
Have there been failures in my writing? Of course. Based on my success with the books mentioned in the previous paragraph, I wrote two for the publishing company, Prentice-Hall. With the exception of one called Research in Speech Communication which I wrote with Raymond K. Tucker (senior author because of his seniority), and Cynthia Berryman-Fink, and sold well, I had two books, Understanding Public Communication and Understanding Business Communication that went nowhere.
Offsetting these two failures, I had wonderful success with a HarperCollins textbook, Understanding Interpersonal Communication that went through seven editions. I was writing these textbooks, writing close to 100 academic articles, giving speeches, and directing a basic speech-communication course all at the same time. For me, it was a gratifying fulfillment and, at the same time, anecdotal proof that a worldview of great expectations works.
In relationships, great expectations offered numerous opportunities to date and then find a relationship partner with whom I have lived for more than 45 years. They (great expectations) supplied a family life that has been truly exceptional, supportive, encouraging, and positive.
If I were to suggest a bottom line to this essay, I would end in the way I began: “From a very early age — as far back as I can remember — I always did well in school. For all the home work and preparation I did for my classes, I was continually rewarded positively. This buoyed my confidence, of course, but also, it propelled me to continue in the same direction.
Positive results provide a template for continued similar performance.” I truly believe that success in school, for me, is what allowed or prompted, if you will, the production of (or adoption of the worldview) great expectations. And it is those great expectations that have, on a continuing basis, resulted in the great successes I have experienced.
- - - - - - - - - -
Jason Osborn, at web site EzineArticles, has a brief essay, “Great Life - How to Live Your Life Full of Happiness and Success,” that offers three suggestions: 1) Do what makes you happy, 2) Create successful habits, and 3) Learn to enjoy life.
From the Associated Content from Yahoo web site, in the essay, “Five Steps to Live a Happy and Successful Life” (February 8, 2006), JS Anandrahi offers five rules. They are the rule of 1) priority, 2) learning, 3) sincerity, 4) discipline, and 5) change.
- - - - - - - -
Copyright September, 2012, by And Then Some Publishing L.L.C.
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